Uncertainty. Decisions. Let's do this.

So last post, I gave the overview of our journey with infertility and where we stood.  We left on the note that Brian and I would be waiting a year to go through with the IVF cycle in Greece due to my recent diagnosis with shingles.  We were as okay with that decision as we could be.  To explain recent events...we have to go back in time a bit.  

When I first got my diagnosis with shingles, I emailed our main contact here (the nurse practitioner in our doctors office - named Brandi) and our contact in Greece (Ruth).  I received an email back from Ruth saying that I should be fine to continue on with IVF - yay!  Good news.  I received an automatic reply from Brandi that she was on vacation...for the next two weeks. Bah!  Because we like to cover all of our bases, I called the doctors office here and talked to the other nurse practitioner named Karen.  She wasn't sure about how shingles would effect IVF and so she wanted to talk to others in the office.  They didn't know either.  She talked to the embryologist and he is the one who said MAYBE the shingles could negatively effect the IVF cycle.  His reasoning was that the virus that causes it is in the chicken pox family and if a woman gets chicken pox in their first trimester, the chances of birth defects increases.  Since I have shingles, I could potentially expose the new embryo to the virus and it could have negative effects. 

So since one person said that it could be dangerous - we decided to postpone for a year.  

We are dealing with our decision, we let Ruth/Greece know we aren't coming and its obviously not a good day for us.  I write the previous blog post to help process everything and I feel pretty content that we made the right decision - its just too risky.

Five days after my original blog post.  

Brandi (remember the nurse practitioner from our doctor's office here) is back from vacation and she sees my original email and replies that it should be fine.  Shingles should have no effect. 

AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.  

So. 

Many. 

Mixed. 

Opinions. 

So of course my mind starts working.  I start doing more research.  I again, can't find any that connects shingles and IVF.  I read about shingles.  A lot.  I probably know more about shingles than I ever wanted or needed to know.  Its remnants from the chickenpox virus that I got when I was younger that stayed in my nerve endings and then gets reactivated...normally by stress.  Go figure.  Stress.  Psh.  I'm the least stressed out person alive. :)  So once its reactivated, it stays along a single nerve line and produces a rash with sores that are incredibly painful.  Mine happened to be on my right side extending from my spine to my underarm.  

At this point, most of the people we talk to and the research we find says that shingles don't effect the reproductive organs and it shouldn't be an issue since mine didn't spread past my one nerve line.  Only one doctor has said that MAYBE it could have an effect but there is no research supporting it.  

So Brian and I talk.  We go over the maybes, the what ifs, all the uncertainty.  We try and make a decision - but all of our decisions are normally fact based.  There are no facts to go off of here.  We are worried we are just hearing what we want to hear and not what is right.  But in this scenario - is there a right?  Without the ability to look into the future, how do you know?  *if any of you have some magic crystal ball you'd like to share...now would be the time to point that out to us* :) 

So we have three major questions in our mind.  

1.  What if we go, it works and the baby is perfectly healthy? <---obviously the scenario we want!

2.  What if we go, it doesn't work....was it the shingles or was it really never going to work? 

3.  What if we go, it works, but something happens to the baby?  Would we ever forgive ourselves for being impatient? 

Question 3 is really the hardest to swallow.  What if something happens?  But...science me is thinking the birth defect rate for the chicken pox/1st trimester connection is only 1-2%.  That's really not much.  At all.  Its more than 0%...but still.  

All of this uncertainty and decisions are hard to process. So we contact Ruth (the nurse from Greece) and ask her to talk to the doctors/embryologists there.  They think we should be perfectly fine - no issues.  Okay...remember when we said that none of Brian's sperm were moving last time?? What if that happens again...she replied that again, its no problem.  There are ways around that.  *disclaimer - we don't know for sure what it is, we are still waiting on the test results*

Back and forth. 

What do we do?

Uncertainty.

Lots of questions.

No right answer. 

Time to make a decision.  

Let's do this.  

So - we decide - let's do this.  

There will always be risk.  The majority of doctors (minus one) says that shingles should have no issue.  Is one person's MAYBE worth waiting another whole year??  What if shingles reoccurs next year?? Right now, the timing just feels right to us.  We think this is the right decision for us and we are going to go for it.  

So....

Flights are booked. 

We will be staying with Ruth (the nurse).

Protocol is made. 

Timeline is set.  

We have a house sitter/dog sitter.  

We will be in Greece from July 18th - August 5th.  And if all goes well and it's meant to be - we will come home pregnant!  

We know there is risk.  But there is always risk.  Please keep us in your thoughts, prayers, juju, good vibes or anything else positive! We will keep you updated!  

Our Journey With Infertility

To say its been a while since I've posted would be and understatement.  This last year has been a whirlwind of being crazy, busy all the time.

In our Christmas letter, we mentioned that we have been trying to start our family for a while now but I didn't do much expanding past that.  Close friends and family know more of the process we have been through, but infertility is not an easy topic to just bring up and talk about in normal day to day conversation.

Personally, I process things though talking about them. I will happily tell the same stories of events of my day to Brian and my Mom because it helps me reflect and decide what the next steps I will need to take.  I share successes, failures, oops moments and just brainstorm in general.

So this blog will serve a multitude of purposes.

1. I need to write out my thoughts, I couldn't sleep last night because I keep running scenarios over and over in my head and I need to get them out.  
2. To catch people up on what we have been going through.  You might know we have been having issues, or you might know the whole story.  But this is the current update. 
3. For anyone else who struggles with infertility, so that you know you aren't alone.  This whole process freaking sucks - we might not know your specific story, but we understand.  

Lets start from the beginning.  

October of 2012 - We have been married almost 5 years at this time and we hear the question "when are you going to start your family?" Our fall back answer was "eventually!"  Up until now, a child really wasn't feasible with our jobs and our financial situation.  But then we found out that Johnathan and Ashley (my brother and sister in law) were expecting.  We knew we only wanted one child, and being close to their cousin that lives so close would be important for them to have a "sibling-ish" type bond.  Being the same age would allow them to grow up together.   So we talked about it and decided that it was time to stop trying to prevent getting pregnant.  I can't say we were really "trying" but we weren't stopping it at this point.  

December of 2013 - Over a year later and we still aren't pregnant.  This is where our conversations to go see a doctor start coming into play.  I knew I could potentially have some issues getting pregnant because my mom had to use chlomid to get pregnant with my brother - like mother like daughter right??  Well, this is a very hard mental block to get through.  To admit to yourself that something is wrong with your body that it isn't doing what its made to do.  You rationalize.  Maybe its just not the right time.  It'll happen.  Every one tells you to relax - it'll happen.  

**Disclaimer - this is all science to me and you all know that I love science - so if you don't want to know about ovulation, sperm counts, motility or all that infertility jazz...let your eyes glaze over for a bit**

April of 2014 - We finally have our first doctors appointment.  It went great.  Our doctor explained everything well and he was funny.  He made it sound like bada-bing-bada-boom-baby!!!!  They took blood from me that day and they scheduled Brian's first semen analysis.  My blood work came back and I had abnormally high levels of AMH at 8.4 when you want it between 4-6.8.  Basically that means I hardly ever ovulate - i.e.  I don't drop eggs. Brian's sperm count came back at 2 million and only 50% of them were moving.  Which means he really only had about 1 million viable swimmers.  Sounds great right?? No, normal count is 20 million healthy ones.  

So from there Brian had to see a urologist to make sure there was no underlying cause of the infertility like cancer.  The urologist gave him the all clear and put him on chomid to up his count.  I was put on Metformin to fix my hormone imbalance and try and get me to ovulate.  This is where the waiting starts.  

Waiting is the worst.  

You can't do anything else but ponder the "what if's"

You hope for better results next time.  

You research what the next steps could be. 

So scientist in me - that's what I did.  I focused on the science.  I did research.  I knew we were hoping to get better results next time and we could just do a round of chomid for me and bam!  Baby!  If that didn't work, then you go to IUI (inter-uterine insemination).  Basically that's artificial insemination using Brian's sperm.  If that didn't work, then you do IVF (in vitro fertilization) where they take out my egg, take out his sperm, combine them in a petri dish, let them grow a few days and then put the embryo back in me.  

We were really hoping to hear we were eligible for an IUI. We knew our levels were pretty bad, so the $150 option of cholmid for me wouldn't be an option.  The IUI is about $1,500 to do a cycle.  IVF is about $12,500.  So obviously we were hoping for the cheaper option.  

September of 2014 - More tests.  Brian's count went up to  6.5 million...but still only 50% viable.  So really its only 3.25 million.  But still better! Downfall, you can't do an IUI unless you have at least 10 million viable sperm or you are just wasting your money.  I appreciate the doctors honesty but hearing to stay on meds and hope for better next time sucks.  

This is also the same time we get the news that Johnathan and Ashley are expecting again!  Yay!  Anyone who has gone through infertility knows that we are sincerely happy for them.    I can't emphasize that enough.  I love my niece and nephew so much, but here is where it gets hard for us.  When I got the picture that River was going to be a big sister, I was so extremely happy for them because it's what they wanted - but I was so extremely sad for us.  I was probably the worst wedding guest ever at Jacque and Nate's wedding because I couldn't stop crying.  I want to be a Mom so bad and I want to love my own child unconditionally and to just keep wishing and not have it happen was so hard.  

Until this past week (I'll get there), this time frame was probably the hardest for me.  It seemed like there were baby announcements everywhere I looked and I so hoped I could be a part of them one day.  My heart ached.  I would stand in front of the mirror and try to imagine what it would be like if I had a baby bump.  I was extremely jealous and all the emotions were building inside.  So I started to talk about it a little more to people.  Like I said before, talking about it helps me process.  So I visited infertility blogs and related to people who had been there too.  I was a silent observer at this point, but it helped me process internally.   

December of 2014 - Brian has another analysis done.  He is only at 9 million and the motility went down.  Really only about 4 million viable.  So IUI is out.  We are told that really our only options are IVF or adoption.  We know IVF is incredibly expensive ($12,500) and so we start looking into adoption.  When we tell people those are our options, they reply with "well why don't you just adopt?"  Like its that easy.   Holy crap.  Adoption is also crazy expensive.  Have you ever looked at one of those forms?  You have to fill out what you are "okay" with.  

Mom on drugs the whole pregnancy?  

What about alcohol?  

What about no prenatal care?  

Do you want to pay for living costs while she is pregnant? 

Pay this money upfront, but you'll lose money if they change their mind.  

They have to pick you - tell me why you are the best couple who deserves their baby.  

Read the other parent's stories who have waited twice as along as you for a family and then feel like an ass when you think about going up against them for a child.   

Adoption is a hard thing to swallow.  Not only do you have to mentally consider what you do and do not want to agree to - but you also have to mourn the idea that you won't have a baby of your own.  

I was talking about all this with my Mom one day trying to process.  The next day she tells me that her and Dad will pay for a round of IVF.  My jaw hits the floor.  We didn't ask, they just offered.  Words cannot express my gratitude to them.  It wouldn't be an option for us without their help.  I could go on and on about how awesome my parents are.  But the bottom line is, I want to be a Mom so bad because I want to be like my Mom.  My Mom is my best friend and she is my idol.  If I can be half the Mom she is, my kid is set. 

So we schedule an appointment to meet with our doctor about IVF. 

January 2015 -  Doctors appointment goes well.  He thinks we are good candidates for IVF.  Cost estimate $12,500-14,500.  Ugh.  That's a hard one to swallow. We take home the packet and read through the whole thing.  Side effects?  Holy crap.  This should be fun.  Injections?  Yay, needles!  But overall, we are excited, we are finally moving forward. 

February 2015 - I'm at girls swimming state and Brian attends and infertility conference in KC.  He attends a session about how to survive the cost of infertility.  (we were truly grateful to my parents being willing to pay, but we wanted to minimize the cost as much as possible).  He hears about IVF abroad.  Basically, do all your testing here - send the results abroad and then go there to do the procedure.  Why?  Its so much cheaper!!!  Even with travel, accommodations etc - its only about $8,500 for the whole thing.  

So I do what I do best.  I start researching.  I contact a few companies and we finally settle on the one Brian heard about at the conference - IVF Treatment Abroad with Ruth Pellow.  Ruth is a nurse in Greece and she works with a few clinics to get couples from the US to come abroad to do treatment.  She sends us tons of info on the places and we have to decide.  Lots of communication occurs...

April 2015 - We are going to Greece.  We decided that we will be doing a round of IVF in July in Athens, Greece.  We start doing all our testing that needs done.   Brian has another semen analysis.  His count is up to 12.5 million!!! But the motility is 0%.  Freaking 0%!!!!! That means that NONE of his sperm are viable.  

UGH!!!!

So they want him to wait till June 11th to do another test.  (there is a chance it was an error).  Everyone cross your fingers that it was an error.  Because if the motility is 0% - IVF is off the table and we are back to square one.  

June 2015 - I get a rash on my side.  I think its just a fungal infection and I put some ointment on it and its not helping.  Go to my summer job to try and work through the pain.  Not happening.  Feel like I'm going to throw up the pain is so bad.  A friend takes me to Urgent Care - I have freaking shingles.  

weFNJIO; T4WO[V FNWOANC[FNUOW J WIO RHIO RH. *insert multiple curse words*

UUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

You have got to be kidding me.  

Nope. 

Shingles. 

So I email Ruth to see how this will effect IVF.  Ruth can't find much research on it (neither can I) but her/the embryologist thinks we should be okay.  As long as the sores are gone by the time we get there...it shouldn't be effected.  Shouldn't be effected is hard to swallow when we have one chance for this and its a lot of freaking money. 

So we talk to our doctor here and the embryologist.  He agrees that there really isn't any research on this.  Apparently we are a rarity.  Perfect. 

He says to wait.  

Wait?  

Yes, wait.  Shingles is the chicken pox virus reactivated in my nerve endings.  If a woman gets chicken pox within the first trimester of the pregnancy, the birth defects rate increases.  So I could potentially be exposing my child to the virus, thus risking their health.

We are not okay with that.  It's not a risk we can take.  

So we wait.  

Until next summer. 

Why next summer you ask?  Because we have to travel on certain days for the IVF cycle and I can't take off work for 2 weeks in the middle of the school year.  And no, my cycle doesn't match up with Christmas or Spring break either.  Bah!  

So July of 2016 it is.   

We are back to the waiting game.  We are still going to do the final testing to make sure we would have been all clear to do an IVF cycle this year so that we don't waste a year of waiting.  But still.  Its so frustrating.  

We are hoping that there is a bigger plan to all of this.  That the timing just isn't right and next year will be better in the long run.  But the whole situation sucks.  Freaking sucks.  

No positive pregnancy test. 

No pregnancy announcement.

No picking out furniture. 

No getting the nursery ready. 

No baby shower. 

No swollen feet. 

No contractions. 

No baby.  

At least not for another year.  So today, today I am struggling.  I'm struggling to be positive and see the big picture.  I'm tired of waiting.  I'm tired of my body not doing what it's designed to do.  

But.  

I have to remember that there is a grand scheme of things.  Hopefully in a few years I can look back and think about this challenging time and be grateful for the hardships that brings Brian and I closer and makes us a stronger team.  

Eventually we will be a family of 5 (Jack and Ally are our kids right now) and hopefully I can read this in the future with a little one snuggling in my arms one day.  

2014 in a Nutshell

To be honest, 2013 sucked jinglebells.  Brian was sick and had surgery, we got hit with big medical bills, cars broke down, and it was just one thing after another that wasn't going right.  So both Brian and I decided that since 2013 was just a wreck, 2014 had to be all sparkly, merry and bright to make up for it. 

2014 definitely lived up to our prediction, but things are just so busy that I didn't have time to do Christmas cards and get them in the mail like I normally do.  We didn't even have a chance to get an official Christmas letter done and out in time - so you get a blog.  Hey, cookie crumbs are better than no cookie at all right?

Lets start with Brian, because he had less going on in his life. (no, offense babe - you know its true).  Brian continues to work as a electrical drafting technician at Burns and McDonnell.  Basically he works quickly on a computer making lines, circles, text boxes and all sorts of other things.  I once observed him and seriously, he would give the Trans Siberian Orchestra a run for their money on the amount of epilepsy he could cause by watching him work.  He likes it, and that's all that matters.  At home, I put him to work on the remodel.  At the very end of the remodel - Brian had yet another surgery.  I've told him numerous times that I'm ready for an updated model of him that doesn't have health issues! :)   He had a bulging disc in his lower back that the doctors went in and fixed.  It wasn't near as invasive as his last surgery and we were in and out in one day.  He's a trooper!  He is almost back to full health and he is feeling great! 

This year we took on the biggest rennovation that we have ever done...in case you've missed all the endless facebook posts of our remodel addiction....in the two and a half years since we've had our house we have remodeled

#1:  The Basement

 

#2: The Master Suite

 

#3: The Craft Room

 

 

and finally....

#4: The Main Floor 

If you have ever visited our house - you know how dramatically different it looks now.  We have talked about doing this remodel since we bought our house and it is AMAZING.  There are many times we sit here and think....this cannot be the same room.  The transformation is phenomenal and we are so proud of it.  I like to claim a lot of the credit - but I really can't.  I worked through the whole process and a huge shout out has to go to Brian.  He is amazing.  While I was holed up in the craft room working on school work, he was busting his jolly 'ole ass on the remodel.  Also, my parents deserve a huge thank you!!! They have been a ridiculously huge support and this literally would have never been possible with out them.  They are nothing short of epic and we can't say thank you enough. 

As for me...life is crazy.  I started this year by ending my job at Oak Grove where I worked for 3 years.  I was lucky enough to score a new job at the Blue Springs School District.  I did my student teaching there in 2010 and then I got to go back!  It was a very exciting time in March when I got the job...only to have to wait 5 months to actually start the job!  And you know I'm about as patient as the kid on Christmas Morning (excluding my brother and I because sleep was much more valuable than opening presents early). 

I did get a jump start on the job this summer when I attended a month of training for the Biomed classes I teach.  It was a LONG month, but it was awesome.  I was surrounded by teachers who were just as passionate about teaching as I am.  It was one of those professional development experiences where everyone is drinking the spiked eggnog and everyone walks away a better person and educator.  

Then I put all that to use in the fall when I started my new job.  I'm definitely in a unique situation this year...  I'm at Blue Springs South High School in the morning teaching Medical Interventions and Biology, then I travel to Blue Springs Freshmen Center to finish out my day teaching Principles of Biomedical Science.  

2 schools + 3 classrooms + 3 different classes + 144 kids = never a boring day for me

Of course we can't forget the extracurricular activities either.  I'm the sponsor of HOSA (Health Occupations Students of America) at the Freshmen Center and I'm an assistant coach of the Girls Swimming at South.  

I've finally found a wine that I like - and that helps with the stress.  Most days I feel like I'm giving Santa a run for his money on what he does once a year and I do it every day, but I honestly wouldn't have it any other way.  I'm exhausted, but I wouldn't do it if I didn't love it. 

Looking forward to 2015, we have one main goal...to start our family!  For those who don't know, we have been trying for about 2 years now with no luck.  We went to visit a fertility specialist this past April and found out that we have issues with both of us that make it a lot more difficult to conceive. We have had tests, been on meds and had re-tests.  We find out this coming Monday what the next step is.  (dang you Santa for postponing test results!!).  Whether the next step is an IUI, IVF or adoption; we hope to be parents or expecting parents by the next time you get a Christmas letter.  Everyone cross your fingers, send good vibes, pray, do a rain dance or whatever you do to send positive test results our way so that we can go with the cheaper option of making a baby!  

 

This year has been filled with lots of ups and downs from job stress, fertility issues, remodel craziness, and surgeries but overall, its been a great year.  

Here's to an even better 2015 coming our way! 

Am I Crazy?

When I say its been a while since I posted...that's an understatement this time. 

Stressed.

That is an accurate description of my life as of late.

To explain....here is what I've been up to the past couple months.

1.  I got a new job!  If you didn't know, I got hired by the Blue Springs School District to teach their Project Lead The Way courses!  I'll be doing Principles of Biomedical Science (PBS) at the Freshmen Center, Medical Interventions (MI) and regular Biology at Blue Springs South High School!  I am thrilled!! I get to go back to where I did my student teaching!  I also got hired as the Asst. Swim Coach and the sponsor for the chapter of HOSA (Heath Occupations Students of America).  = Next year is going to be crazy busy!!

2.  Finished my last year at OG in May!  Room is all packed up and I am all moved out [meaning my guest room is packed with school stuff],  and ready to start my new job at Blue Springs. Hardest part...leaving my kids.  So glad facebook exists so that I can keep in touch!

3.  During the last week of school, I started my first graduate class for my Specialist Degree in Educational Technology from UCM.  It's a six-week foundations class and next week is my last week...so far I have a 100%!

4.  The day school got out, we left to go on our annual kayking trip!  It was exhausting, but a blast!  We had a really good time and it was beautiful as always!

5.  When we returned, I literally had one day off before I started working my summer job.  My summer job helping run the grading of the AP tests in KC started on May 28th and my last day was June 15th.  No days off in between and working 10-12  hour days each day.  I was proud of myself because I did walk between 7 and 11 miles a day = one exhausted worker! 

6.  During my work extravaganza...I was also still working on my online graduate course.  On top of that, I had my last class for my Master's Degree!  I now officially have my Master's in Secondary Administration! Wahoo!! And....due to the grad credits I'm earning this summer...I'll be a third of the way done with my Specialist Degree by August!

7.  Then comes my current adventure...due to the way Project Lead The Way (the classes I'm teaching next year) I have to be certified in each class before I can teach them. So the day my summer job was over {I even left early} I came down to Rolla, MO for PBS training.  Its a 12 day training, so I'm in a hotel for two weeks.  Today was day 2 of training and its a lot of work, but also a lot of fun.  We are basically going through the entire curriculum of a year in two weeks. The good news is, I'm staying on top of my homework each night.

8.  I leave here on the 27th to go straight home to run my first 5k with my family at the Kansas City Foam Glow.  I'm super excited for that!  Oh, and the last day of my grad class is the 27th too!

So when do I get to take a breath and relax?  The next day????

Oh, wait.  Just kidding.  Its not over yet.

9.  Starting the next day....we are demo-ing the main floor of our house to start our main floor remodel.  I'm really happy I get to help tear down that dang wall!!!!! So we are back to square one on starting yet another remodel that will probably take us 6 months.  Our goal is to have it done by Christmas so that we can have a big gathering with all our family/friends in our big open room!

Then I'm home for a week and I come back to Rolla for two more weeks of training for my MI class for next year.  Then I get two weeks off in which I take the ISLLC Principals Certification Test, help host Ashley's Bridal Shower and Bachelorette Party and then I get the privilege of being a Bridesmaid in their wedding on August 1st!!!! Since I'm technically new to the district of Blue Springs next year...my teacher training starts that following Monday.

Remind me again...what is summer???

Even though I am so incredibly busy...I am also very grateful for all the opportunities that I have.  I may feel like I'm losing my mind on a daily basis, but it will be worth it in the end.  I know this was a lot about me...but Brian has been equally busy keeping up on all the other things that I have neglected because I've been so swamped.  He works, takes care of the dogs, cleans, cooks (<- who's kidding, you all know I don't do this anyways), does laundry, yard work and other needed tasks.  I'm so grateful for all of his help!!!! Love him!!!!

Hope every one else is enjoying a much less chaotic summer than me.  Send me some of your productive charm if you are feeling generous!

Rachell Turns 24!

My birthday this year was quite entertaining!

My birthday was on Friday and I honestly had no clue what Brian was doing for me.  He wouldn't tell me anything and I stopped asking.  Normally I bug him over and over and over and over again to tell me what he has planned...but he always gives in.  He hasn't realized yet that I don't want him to actually tell me what the plan is - I just want to bug him about it.  But he always tells me!  Then I'm disappointed that I know about it.  So I decided that this year I wouldn't bug him about it and then it would be a surprise this year!

So - I was sitting at my Master's class the Wednesday before my birthday and I get an email.  It was a break in class, so like any normal person.  I looked at it.  This is what I saw.

So I knew that by the email he had bought me a kindle paperwhite.  Which is a freaking awesome gift for me because I love to read and its great for him because I won't have to use my ridiculously bright light at night when he is trying to sleep!  So I forward the email to Brian and he denies EVERY THING!  When I got home, he wouldn't tell me anything or give any indication that he had actually bought one!  He was so convincing  that I was feeling crazy and maybe I was so bored at class that I actually made up the email???? NO!  I had to stick to my guns and I knew he had it...but he wouldn't give it to me!  So this was my attitude for the next two days!

When I woke up on my birthday - he left me a note saying that since I had ruined the surprise, I then had to search for my gift.  He only told me that it was in our bedroom.  Thank goodness that he narrowed it down to the 2nd floor...otherwise it would have taken me forever!

I found the kindle right away in one of his shoeboxes.  Easy. And I told him so....he replied that I would never find the case because he hid it too good. 

I was sitting on the bed when I read his text and was thinking where was the best hiding spot.....hmmmm.....30 seconds later I sent him this picture. 

He chose a pretty good place - behind the artwork!  But since he told me it would be "impossible" to find....I found it right way.  He wasn't too happy.  But I loved my gift!  He knows me so well.

The following night we went out to dinner with friends and family and then played games at Dave and Busters.  It was a great weekend!

Welcome to Summer!

To celebrate the start of summer and the end of the school year, my family decided to go on a Kayak Trip on the Buffalo National River in AR. 

We had always talked about wanting to try out kayaking...so my parents took the initiative and bought kayaks and we decided to go!

We went over to their house and dry-loaded the kayaks with all the camping materials to make sure we could fit everything and then we tried them out on the pond behind my parents house. 

I was worried because I have the WORST balance and I was afraid I would tip over every 2 seconds...but....Everything went great and we were super excited to try it out on the river! 

So we left out early (we left Johnathan and Ashley at home because Ashley was 8 months pregnant!) and headed down to the river.  We bought our fishing licenses and got on the river.

I was right....I flipped within a few minutes. Then as my Dad tried to avoid me - he flipped too.  So we spend the first hour of our trip dumping water out of the kayaks.....hahaha

But we eventually got the hang of it and it was a freaking blast!

The scenery was beautiful and it was amazing!  I found out quick that if I lead the way and just went down the rapids - I had a much better chance of not tipping over than if I tried to follow someone else's path.  But that doesn't mean we didn't flip.  It happened about 8 more times over our whole group...me more than anyone else.  I knew balance would be an issue! :)  We almost killed my parents chihuahua a few times...but the little puppy ended up holding his own!  Way to go little guy!

We camped out two nights and had some freaking good food!  Props to my mom for planning some delicious meals!

 On the third day....Brian got a text from my brother, Johnathan, saying "Ashley is in labor.  Come home now!"

Well - the service on the river sucks!  And we didn't know if he was joking or if he was being serious.  We finally got a hold of him and she was in labor!  Of course the little one chose prime time to meet us all!  So we started booking it!  We were paddling quick trying to reach our take out point faster in order to leave for home that night instead of the next day.  We thought she would be in labor for a while and then we would be able to make the four hour drive home in time to be there to support them. 

We made it to the take out point and had to wait on them to deliver the vehicles but we were finally on our way home!  Too bad little munchin decided not to wait for us to drive back...little River was born!

She is so stinking cute!  She is now the highlight of our family and we love her! 

Welcome to the family little one!  Way to end our trip with a bang!

Needless to say - it was a wonderful kick off to my summer.

Bedroom Remodel

In February, we finally finished our second big remodel in our house! 

When we first moved into our house, we moved our bedroom into the master bedroom on the main floor.  But, we did have a second level of our house that was dedicated to another master bedroom with its own bathroom and small closets.  So for the first 10 months or so while we did the basement remodel, the upstairs was just an empty room.

The door straight ahead in the previous picture lead to the attic space.  The doors in the wall on the left above were the small closets.  There is a bathroom opposite the attic that you cannot see (we seem to have lost some pictures).....

 The first thing we did was add a floor to the attic space that will be come the walk in closet (we covered up the old closets)

Then came walls, insulation, electrical and drywall.

Then Brian handmade the shelving for the closet.  He cut out everything and assembled it according to the plans we developed together.  

This is the after picture with it all finished, painted and closet rods are in.  The picture is from my side - so Brian also has this set up on his side as well. 

 

A few months later.......

Brian built the drawers for the built-ins.  (there are handles on them now!)

This is the view from standing in front of the bathroom facing the closet.  Notice how the old closets are gone and covered up.  Brian did make the sliding door apparatus.  It was a PAIN but they are super cool and we love them.  We feel that it makes the room feel more open. 

The view of the finished bed (like the accent wall??) and the bathroom that also has the sliding door. 

 This is the finished bathroom.  There used to be two entry ways (lost the picture) but it was really awkward and stupid.  So I re-tiled the whole bathroom and repainted.  We changed the vanity top/fixtures and added the shower curtain instead of the glass doors.  The glass doors were only 5' tall, so Brian was adamant to change them because he would get decapitated every time he took a shower if he didn't. :)

It was a lot more work than we were planning - but we LOVE it!  It's our little oasis and I'm so glad we waited to move up there until it was done the way we wanted it to be. The last step was the air conditioner addition.  Since the room is basically surrounded by attic space...it was HOT up there...so we got a portable air conditioner to add in there.  5000x more comfortable now.

Overall, it was completely worth it.  Especially since we did the majority of it the two weeks before Brian spent a week in the hospital for his lung. Yeah - he's an overachiever! Super proud of everything he made though, it looks and functions amazing!